Hand them a shovel
Are there degrees to sadness and depression?
Aren’t emotions controlled by the person feeling them?
I have seen and heard many instances where people say you can only control your response to something. That may be true for interacting with others, but what about how you feel on the inside?
I know from experience the feeling is often physical. It causes sickness, fever, gut problems, anorexia, bulimia, panic....
Controlling the things that we can control start happening on a different level. From the inside out.
How do we get out of these situations?.
For some, the digging out is the remedy.
It is reaching out to others who have proven to be solid supporters along the way. For those supporters, it takes resolve to be the better friend. To be willing to listen and assist.
But for the person who feels unlovable or a sense of not fitting in, to reach out to someone for help often makes that person feel too vulnerable. The thought of making new friends feels like an unappealing and insurmountable job. Often, it is easier to live in isolation than to run the risk of feeling the hurt of rejection.
Some people in this state can't find the shovel to start the digging out process.
Becoming sensitive to people in their times of stress is something that all of us need to become better at.
I remember an article I read in college about a person who was at the point of jumping off the bridge. He told himself if one person smiled at him as he walked to the bridge, he would not jump.
A simple smile became the shovel.
It is not only the young kid on the playground or the student in the cafeteria who may need a hand. There are adults out there who need direction also.
People who have a time of feeling insignificant, for whatever reason, need helpers who are “standing in the gap”.
Haven’t we all had overwhelming times of sadness or grief? Haven’t we all had moments when just breathing feels like it is a chore?
If you haven’t, consider yourself lucky. Your time may not have come yet.
Being stopped like this is profoundly difficult and often is the time when a counselor, trusted friend, or mentor comes in.
Someone to help sort things out. Since the people who are drowning in overwhelming feelings can’t do it themselves, it is up to those around them to lend a hand.
Throw them a shovel.
Lend an ear, a shoulder, a soft hear.
Thanks for listening.